Kind of emotional right now:
I’m kind of emotional right now and really having a hard time writing this out so, forgive me if some of this is a little hard to read/follow.
I can’t tell what’s really going on but my mind is working over time. You see, I started this blog simply to get a chance to tell my story as an exercise for my own sanity. I may have done more damage than good.
I’ve never really been an activist in any sense of the word. I’ve supported HRC and other gay geared organizations but that’s about it.
I’ve put on the monkey suite and given a few dollars where I could spare some and just went on about my day. Never really thinking about what was going on outside of my own little world.
There are a lot of reasons for that. The reasons are the same as the reasons why this blog is written under a pen name.
People who know us know that Mac and I go together like Mac and Cheese (thanks Justice for that one, I stole it). We live in the country and love it. We lead very normal lives. Aside from the fact that we are both male, our relationship is the same as any happily married couple.
We have joint bank accounts, credit cards and vehicle titles. We share everything with one another.
So why am I so bothered about anything? Shouldn’t love be enough?
No, love is not enough:
We hear all this talk in the gay rights movement about being able to visit your partner in the hospital, being able to adopt and all of that. Those are all nice sentiments.
We have vague arguments about how allowing gay marriage is a stepping stone to allowing multiple marriages. We constantly have to explain to folks that gay does not mean pedophile. We also have to remind people that our parents were straight when they make the weak ass argument about how 2 gay parents will raise gay children.
These are all tiring conversations. And we get trapped into talking about them rather than focusing on the real issues. If marriage was just a title, it wouldn’t matter at all, I would just say “Mac and I are married” and that would be that.
The truth is heterosexuals may get married for love. They pay their $25.00 to get their license and then they go to a judge (or minister) and get the whole thing finalized.
In this simple act, they get the title of a married couple. But they get so much more than that.
For those $25.00, those taxes to the federal government for Social Security that we’ve been paying since we first started working can be paid back to survivors (next of kin) in the event of one’s death.
For those $25.00 you can own a home together and pay taxes on that home together.
For those $25.00 should anything happen to your spouse you have all of the rights that go with being next of kin. Sure, hospital visitation is one of them, but there’s more!
The truth is, there are over 1,000 protections that those $25.00 gives to married couples that there is absolutely no way (currently) for us to get.
I’m sure I don’t even have to tell you the amount of rights that our military married folks receive that those LGBT service members can never have under the current laws.
So what’s with the sudden frustration:
Well, it’s just started to become a little too overwhelming. When I start seeing what straight folks take for granted. I pay the same taxes that they do but they get to vote on what protections I can and can not have. Meanwhile, we have ministers (who don’t pay taxes at all) telling their congregations to vote against gay rights.
I’m frustrated because, people don’t even realize that MY tax dollars pay for all of those governmental available protections, yet I can’t take advantage of those tax dollars at all.
The government seriously should give me a fucking tax credit for being gay!